A Not-So-Short Short Story: At The Eleventh Hour With The Giant

Sitting in this dark room on the sofa cross-legged, staring at the wall for the past 2 hours has given me time to really think about my life and what I have done with it this past year. My fingers have now come to the realisation that the mug they are holding onto has now gone cold. As I get up to put on the kettle, my fleecy blanket that was once casually strewn across my body falls to the floor, causing the icy air that saturates my apartment to collide with my once warm skin. I quickly snatch my blanket and throw it over me as a shield against the cold and hurry into the kitchen to refill mug with hot tea so that I and my fingers can stop shaking.

Resting on the kitchen counter, hearing the water slowly come to a boil reminds me of the time I went to York on business and ran into Sam at the local pub. Haha. She had changed so much! I couldn't quite believe my eyes when I turned around to see who it was that had tapped my shoulder. I excused myself from the company of my colleagues whom I am sure were glad to see me go as that was at the early stages of their little sordid affair. It was so awkward feeling that much sexual tension between them in that small space we called our own in that packed pub. I would be lying if I said that it did not make me yearn to have someone permanent in my life that just so happens to find me just as attractive as they found each other. Anyway, Sam invited me round to her's that night, which was a stone's throw away from the pub, and we spent the whole night in her kitchen sitting on her huge central kitchen counter with mugs full of hot chocolate with more than a hint of Bailey's reminiscing about our stint in boarding school and catching up on what we have been up to since.

I make myself my fresh cup of tea and slink back to my spot on the sofa, my blanket in tow. I laugh at the crazy things we got up to at that all girls school. The boys who were snuck in. The girls who were snuck out. The teacher's chair that was "kindly" given a fresh lick of paint just before he arrived so that when he sat down his trousers reflected the generosity of the painter. Those were the days! When it was my turn to answer the big question- 'So, what have you been up to missy? The last time I saw you was during our 2nd year of uni'- I fumbled and mumbled a few incoherent strings of phrases as my brain desperately tried to piece together what I had done since we left that was interesting enough to rival her stories. Seeing her face fall in what I took to be pity made my all too familiar tear glands spring into action and give their Oscar-worthy performance. 

It dawned on me that in the 6 years since I last saw her I have done nothing but work. When Sam was meeting the love of her life I was planning on how to throttle my partner because he was not pulling his weight and I could not afford to fail that year's project. When Sam was studying abroad in Germany I was crying over the fact that my boyfriend at the time chose Australia over me. I was a selfsih cow. Sue me. When Sam was volunteering in Kenya one summer I was struggling to figure out which company I wanted to work for as I had offers coming out of my ears which was both a blessing and a curse. When Sam was truly living life I was basically wasting mine behind a desk for 4 years punching numbers and giving presentations and falling into a pathetic cycle that made me feel so alone.

That fateful night was the night my life changed. Sam and I created my first ever bucket list. And with the help of her fit fella, the ridiculous number of holidays I had accrued at work and my rather large savings account they handed me my itinerary for the next 6 months. I was to embark on my very own Euro trip by myself. To which I said, 'Hell no!' and Sam, being the pretty well known travel journalist and travel junkie  that she is decided to accompany me for the 1st few trips to ease me into it. I finally came round and we did the cheesy clinking of our mugs and passed out in Sam's living room from all the excitement. 

That was the night my adventure began.

I down the last dregs of my tea and listen to the howls of the wind outside as it whips round the B&B I am in with great gusto causing the windows to rattle and the wind chimes outside to play a most violent tune. I make a mental note to thank my mother again for getting me the tartan microfleece pajamas I have on as they are amazingly great at aiding to keep my body temperature at a decent level. Today is the day I turn 27 and it also happens to be the last day of my 6 month adventure. Looking back at all I have achieved in this year alone threatens to set my Oscar nominated tear glands off for a grand finale. I can't quite believe I managed to juggle both work and a colourful social life. 

For the past 8 trips on, I have explored the various cities myself and I am super proud of that. Sam and I started off in France and work our way round Europe. It was amazing! Expensive... but amazing. I was then given the big task of finishing off my adventure by getting to know the UK. I can't say I am a big fan of the south as I'm a Northern girl through and through but I can see why people love it. I started my UK trip there and worked my way back up north. I am now currently in Scotland. Have been for 4 days now but it was only yesterday when I arrived in Edinburgh. It has been years since I have been here it is almost criminal. Scotland is such a lovely place despite the unbearably cold weather. 

I close my eyes and convince myself that I will look like an idiot if I go to The Peartree dressed in my pajamas with my hair tucked away in a hairnet. I bravely throw my blanket off me and rush into the bathroom to get ready. I hear a knock on my door not 10 mins later which startles me as I am not expecting anything to be brought to my room.

'Just hang on a second!' I yell. 'Won't be a minute!'

I yank on my unnaturally tight Dorothy Perkins jeans over my hideously fat arse and pull my Zara jumper over my head, shoving my arms through the wonderfully soft sleeves. Ruffling my hair a bit and swiping on a lit of lipgloss over my lips I open the door to find a giant in front of me. I let a rather indescribable noise out from my mouth as I watch it take steps towards me. I instinctively back away into my room as I try to process what is happening as quickly as I can.

'Sarah, ok I know what you must be thinking. Would you quit walking away from me? You'll head out the window if you back away any further', it says in a deep familiar voice. 

A voice that I was once so anxious to hear over the phone every night throughout my first two years at uni. A voice that quickly became the little voice in my head that steers me away from wrong and urges me to trust my gut. A voice that belonged to a man who won my heart with the wink of an eye, a flash of the sexiest grin I've ever seen and a night in eating homemade lasagna as we watched Lord of The Rings. A voice that was replaced by an unbearable silence and an ache in my heart since the day it joined its owner to fly half way across the world.

It is funny how one day you could be at in a pub in York going through the motions, catching the weighted looks your present company are throwing at each other and not really realising how much time you have wasted. And then boom! You are in a cute B&B up in Edinburgh about to head to a very popular pub to meet up with your mate Sam and her now  fiancé when suddenly, at quite literally the eleventh hour the man who once clawed his way into your personal fortress barges his way back into your life, with the help of your so-called best mate and her fiancé, and still has the audacity to take your breath away.

After a rather loud and long exchange of words between us which most consisted of me biting his head off for assuming that I would still be in love with him, working with Sam to get me to end my adventure here... in the B&B his parents OWN and for not believing that we could have made it work- Oh yeah! He dumped me because he didn't believe in long distance relationships. The twat!- he grabs my hand and drags me to his car. He drives a very angry me to The Peartree to meet up with my now ex-best friend and her soon-to-be-dead  fiancé to celebrate New Years together. Did I mention that The Giant is Sam's soon-to-be brother-in-law? Just one big happy family this is. Urgh!! 

Anyways, Sam hands me a pint of larger with an apologetic smile that I take begrudgingly and I look around at everyone enjoying themselves as the barman has signaled that it is the last minute of 2013. I take a sneaky look at The Giant that turned out to not be so sneaky as he was already watching me.

'I'm sorry', he mouths as he hands me a note.

30 seconds left.

I study the battered piece of paper. I can't believe he kept it. The bastard! Just when I convinced myself  that this was a justified situation to rub my nose to spite my face he goes and does this?! I look into his eyes and watch as his body quickly shifts and appears barely an inch away from me.

Ten. Nine. Eight.

Do I leave him in 2013?

Seven. Six. Five.

Or...

Three. Two. One.

I close my eyes and trust the little voice in my head. I don't hear the supposedly loud cheer or the see the fireworks or feel the beer that was mistakenly pour over my tarted Ugg boots. All I feel right now- with his big arms around me and his lips stuck to mine and my good old tear glands warming up as Sam and her fit fella scream with delight- is home. 

Because home is where the heart is right?

*  *  *  *  *  Happy New Year *  *  *  *  * 

Read It Or Not: Great Expectation

[source]

Reading a book this month that is considered to be one of the classics seemed only right.  For my birthday, my siblings gave me a copy of Charles Dickens':

 Great Expectation.

I had been moaning about how I do not read that many books written by male authors and now I will have the chance to read one by a well renowned male author. I know some of you may be shocked by the fact that I have not yet read this book at least once before but it is ok because I am reading it now. And I can't wait to stick my nose in it and get lost in the world Charles created.

This is my book for December.

Feel free to join me on this adventure or share  your verdict on the books I plan to read or recommend the ones you love.

Yours truly,

Mo x

NaNoWriMo: Results

[source]

Well, as to be expected I did not stick to writing everyday nor did I finish my "book" on the 6th of December. I actually feel quite sad about it because I was really excited at the prospect of finally finishing a book. It just got to a point where I ran out of steam and my characters took a break from me therefore making it impossible for me to scribbled down what they were getting up to in my head. However, during those breaks I did manage to produce two short stories that I am quite proud of.

They were quite unlike anything I had written before. It felt like my writing had... grown up a bit. I dunno. You tell me what you thought of them (here & here). I have many more ideas for short stories quite like the ones I have recently posted but I want to finish the original story I started. I am just a bit of a perfectionist when it comes to writing novels. I have this grand idea of what my 1^st book should be and I don't want to be totally crappy. Only sliiiiightly crappy hehe.


So here is what I plan to do:

1. Transcribe all my work onto my laptop- I did manage to write 46 A4 pages worth of a book...  
2. Edit my work- whittle those 46 pages down to pages containing only quality work and zero crap!
3. Finish the story- if my imagination runs too wild, as it always does, I will close my eyes and eventually write 'The End' by the end of the month.

I aim to print it out and have it bound. Once I do, I shall take a picture of it, document it here and smile until my face starts hurting because it will mean that I finally did it. I am not as brave as other people I know who really put themselves and their work out there. I cling onto my words and share them with but a few. Even though not that many people read this blog I still feel like I have taken a big step and "published" my work for others to see and that is good enough for me. Maybe one day I will publish a book properly and have it on a shelf in a book store oozing a hippy vibe. I just hope that the hands that book falls into will never let it go because it was able to touch their life and stretch their imagination just like my favourite books do to me every time I read them.

Yours truly,

Mo x

Short Story: Days In The Park

I worry about you.

I am thankful everyday for you but I worry about you.

You spend all your days and nights worrying about me and the kids, you hardly have the time to take proper care of yourself. I go to bed every night praying that tonight will be the night you sleep well but, that night has not yet come. I feel you wake up every 3 hours or so, tossing and turning and sighing and groaning as silently as you can. I pretend to roll over in my sleep and reach out for you, holding you as long as my tired arms will allow it. I feel your heart rate steadily drop and the tension in your tall, broad and strong body leave you as you find your way back to me. To here. Our bed. Our home. Our safe place.

I made sure today that you woke up to the smell of freshly baked bread and grilled sausages and an already fed set of 5 year old twin boys and a lovely, yet troublesome, 2 year old girl. I hear you slowly make your way downstairs, into the kitchen, and the sight of that smile, the one that momentarily stopped my heart all those many moons ago when I first laid eyes on you, takes my breath away even now. You kiss me good morning, placing an arm around my not so svelte body and whisper how beautiful I am. I blush and reach up to hold your face in my hands. Though the frown lines are almost permanently etched into your face I do sense a little bit of life and spark in those lovely brown eyes of yours. The kids notice your presence and run as fast as they can from the living room to come and greet you.

'Can we go to the park now, dad? You promised to take us to the park today'.

'Yes, dad. I too remember this promise'.

'Par daddy! Par!'

You smile and pick little Ruth up and tell them all to get ready to go out. I attempt to get the boys showered and dressed but you tell me not to worry, that you will handle it. And that you've run me a bath so I should go enjoy that. Tears creep into my eyes, daring to pour out but I manage to keep my emotions in check and head upstairs as quickly as I can.

Once we are all fed and showered and dressed, we make our merry way to the park. The boys, each holding their favourite toy, James a frisbee and John a football, are way ahead of us; their energy doubling the closer we get to the park. You hold my and Ruth's hand as we trail gleefully behind.

I make a beeline for the nearest bench as you and the kids break free and run amok, playing with the leaves and chasing each other as you play tag. I smile as I watch you make castles out of the green-brown leaves with Ruth and see how relaxed you seem. I catch your eye and you wink at me.

My heart flutters.

I rest my hand on my ever-growning tummy and whisper to our most anticipated Christmas gift, 'I can't wait for you to join our little gang of mischief'. I can't help but feel incredibly blessed. I close my eyes and silently thank God for answering all my prayers and giving me much more than I deserve.

I want everyday to be like our days in the park. You laughing, the kids spending quality time with you and the man I fell in love with many suns ago winning the battle against his more worrisome self. I know you are anxious and uncertain of your ability to provide for our growing family, especially now with me being a stay-at-home-mum, but I really hope that you get to have more days like today so that you can enjoy all that we have accomplished so far.

You make your way over to me, the kids hot on your heels. You place a hand on our bump and kiss me long and hard, much to the kids disgust. We laugh and I tell you I love you. You smile that smile that melted my heart many days and arguments and date nights and PTA meetings and make-up sex ago and tell me you love me too. You pull me towards you and wrap an arm around me as we sit on the bench and watch the kids  go off and play in the leaves some more. I feel how relaxed your body is and how steady your breathing is and I close my eyes, enjoying this moment.

Yes, I really wish everyday to be like our days in park as we so fortunate to be having them at all.

***                 ***

Happy Thanksgiving & Happy Hanukkah!

Short Story: In The Mornings

I wake up, like every morning, and roll over to your side of the bed to drink in the lingering warmth that your body creates when you lie next to me. I feel the sunlight lightly kissing my skin because you, like every morning, open the curtains and windows to taste the new day when you get up. I hear you bustling about as you get ready for work; the hissing of the iron, the creaking of the floorboards, the sound of running water are all instruments that are used in the song that I listen to every morning.

I groan at the sound of the door closing behind you as you make your hurried way to the kitchen to fix yourself something to eat. At least I hope you are eating and not living on caffeine alone. I let the familiar guilt crawl its way into my stress-stricken body and drown me with the fact that I am a terrible person for not taking proper care of you and ensuring that you are well fed. What would your mother think? She already does not approve of me. Instead of getting up to check you are in fact eating solid food I lie here, in bed, wrapping myself with the huge blanket we are using as a duvet this summer to stop the cold from gnawing at my fingers and toes.

I hear the door slam again quickly followed by the sweet smell of freshly made coffee. You set my coffee filled Scooby Doo mug down on the bedside table along with a buttered bagel, lie down next to me and pull me into your ever so warm embrace. Just like you do every morning. I feel hot tears trickle down my face as, like every morning, you remind me of how much you love me. The way you stroke my hair sends ripple of calm throughout my body that eventually halts the tears. I fell your soft lips plant themselves on my forehead releasing bursts of hot spots all over my body. I am very aware that we do not have much time left before you have to leave so I free my mind from all other thoughts and savour these last few moments we have together before we join the daily grind of the working life.

On time, as always, we hear the alarm go off. You pry yourself out of my embrace and head out the door. As the front door closes and I hear you turn the key I sit up and reach for the cup of coffee you made me. After I take the first sip of liquid luck I can feel my insides latching onto every drop that makes it way into my tummy. I finish it and get out of bed to perform all my morning rituals- make the bed, do the washing up, set the table for dinner and finally hop into the shower.

I miss you already.

It is like this every morning. I am sure that I cannot be the only one that believes that mornings have a funny way of affecting the rest of your day more powerfully that other times of the day. You always starts mine off right. 

Once I have patted myself dry, lathered my skin with body lotion and put on my clothes, I sit on your side of the bed, munching on my bagel. Right there and then I make up my mind up my mind to try harder to make your mornings as special as you make mine. Although I am not even remotely a morning person, it is in the mornings that I truly value the best thing that has ever happened to me.

I will try not to bring work home tonight. And I think I will make Thai green curry for dinner, as you really like that. And I will also try to go to bed early. That way I can be well rested when I wake up earlier tomorrow to start your day with a kiss, a cup of coffee and breakfast in bed.

Just like you do for me every morning.

Read It Or Not: Quiet

[source]

I have been taking an unusually long time to read the book that is currently my lunchtime companion- Quiet by Susan Cain. Granted it is not the normal kind of book that I reach for but, I became most intrigued when Shirley (blog: meek-n-mild) did a post on it a few months ago. The cover of the book was all white and it posed a question that I had been asking myself repeatedly all year-

Can an introvert thrive in a world that cannot stop talking?

I am sure I am not the only one who dreads assessment centres stage in the interview process or giving presentations to a number of people especially when it nears the double or triple digits. 

This is my book for November.

Feel free to join me on this adventure or share  your verdict on the books I plan to read or recommend the ones you love.

Yours truly,

Mo x

Read It Or Not: Billy and Me

I finished this book about a month ago but have only been able to document my thoughts now because of internet issues (recently moved into my own flat) and because I finally knew how to express my thoughts on Billy And Me. 

Now, onto the book...

As first published books go I think Giovanna Fletcher should be extremely proud of 'Billy and Me'. It is a captivating and beautifully written romantic tale that plucked at my heartstrings from the first few pages. I could not put it down. This is another book that caused me to almost miss my stop on the way to work several times. The way she painted the picture of the events that unfolded page after page was so vivid, it felt like I was there. Having lived in Kent, where most of the story was set in, and taken a few trips to London also helped bring the story to life for me; it felt a bit more real.

In the hopes of not giving too much away I will say no more than what the blurb of the book has said.

Sophie May is the main character in this novel and she is the one I most identified with. Her disposition is much like my own so I truly connected with her character and saw most things from her point of view quite easily. The story revolves around her encounter with a certain man, Billy Buskin, in a quaint little village in Kent  and how it catalysed a chain reaction that was sure to change the future of her somewhat ordinary and quiet life. Can one who revels in a quiet life built around the support of their family and close friends thrive in bustling throws of the world of 'Lights! Camera! Action!"? Read the book and you will find out what lies in store for Sophie May and good ol' Billy.

Of course like many other stories there are other worthy characters who deserve a mention but I want you to meet them organically i.e. by reading the book. I have given you a gently nudge in the right direction (I hope! lol) which should allow you to be let in on the world of Sophie May and all the secrets that have kept her from spreading her wings. I really love the way Giovanna writes and only hope to be able to convey my thoughts as eloquently as she does.

Read it or not, that is your choice. But, I really hope you do....

Yours truly,

Mo x

NaNoWriMo

[source]

NaNoWriMo aka National Novel Writing Month.

Oh yeah baby! That is what I am doing this month. Granted I did not prepare for it last month nor did I actually sign up on their website nor am I following any of their rules. So technically, I am not actually taking part in NaNoWriMo . I just decided on a whim (well, the 6^th of November to be exact) that I was going to write at least a page a day on a short story I started whilst at work the other day. But I am taking it one step further. I am going “old school” and will be writing my novel by hand.

I have the tendency to waffle and I feel that if I write the novel using my pen, I will have a better control of conveying my thoughts in a more concise manner. Plus, I do not get to rely on auto-correct so I am learning to spell again haha.

For the first time, I have made a brief outline of the story and will try to stick to it. I normally just see where my imagination takes me and stop when I either feel tired or the end surprises even me. Eeek! It is going to be soo hard to stick to the outline but I will try.

I must take this opportunity to thank Linda from OpenEllbey for introducing me to NaNoWriMo and Meg from MegFee for sharing the song that birthed this story I am writing which will hopefully become my first ever finished and “published” novel.

I am excited for the 6^th of December to roll on by so that I can see how the story evolved. I will be getting someone (my sister and a couple friends) to edit my work before I print it off. But I have to say, it is the keeping of the handwritten version of the story that I am most excited about. Who knows, by next year when I do this again I would have snagged myself a typewriter and use that to write my next novel. That would be too cool!

If any of you have been a part of NaNoWriMo before or are taking part in it this year good luck with your new project! I hope the finished work brings you joy. And to those of you that might be thinking of doing it let me know. We could practise this writing project together and be better prepared for next year’s NaNoWriMo and have a chance of winning :) 

Yours truly,

Mo x

Gone Without A Trace

[source]

Wow!

It has been more than a month since I posted something on here and I apologise. A lot happened in the month of October and life sort of got in the way of things a bit (I sort of touched upon it on my other blog).

I wanted to at least let those of you who read this blog know that things will be up and running again very soon. Hope you book lovers out there have had an amazing time in my absence.

I am back! 

Yours truly,

Mo x

Read It Or Not: Billy and Me

[source]

Now, I know quite a few people grabbed a copy of this book months ago for their summer reading list but I am daring to be different. 

 'Billy and Me' by Giovana Fletcher is the book that has now caught my eye. You may be wondering- who is Giovanna Fletcher? Well, she is girl that is an actress and author... and she happens to be married to Tom Fletcher from McFly. 'Billy and Me' is her debut novel but she also runs a pretty cool blog as well which I visit quite often.

This is my book for October.

Feel free to join me on this adventure or share  your verdict on the books I plan to read or recommend the ones you love.

Yours truly,

Mo x

Read It Or Not: Noughts & Crosses

This book is definitely one that will grab hold of your attention as soon as you turn the first page. I have almost missed by stop so many times on the way to work because of it. I am so surprised a movie has not been made about this. It is such a unique story-line. Well, I say unique because I have not come across a book/film with this particular perspective on the history of mankind.

Noughts & Crosses, to me, is about the politics behind differences in skin colour and the delicate intertwining lives of  Noughts and Crosses (i.e. dark-skinned and light-skinned peeps) but with a very interesting twist. Everything and nothing is flipped in this world. Those of you who have read the book will know exactly what I mean. 

Malorie Blackman is a writer with an amazing talent. If I could describe a world I created as well as she does I would be beyond ecstatic. Although, I will not say that I am happy with the way the book ended. I had to read that last chapter 3 times before I accepted that it was not going to change. 

This book is filled with the power struggles within marriages, friendships, communities and, essentially, the heart. And it poses the following question -  If the world started out differently, would anything be any different? I know Noughts & Crosses would probably find itself in the 'Teens' section of a bookstore but I do not believe it is strictly limited to teenagers alone. I may be desperately trying to cling on to my "youth" but I think anyone can relate to the characters in this book. So, for those of you who have not read it before, do not disregard it based on that fact as I fear you may miss out on a pretty awesome book.

Read it or not, that's your choice.

Yours truly,

Mo x

P.S. This book is part of a series which means that the awesomeness does not end here. I will try to get my hands on copies of the other books and share my thoughts on those too :D

Letters: #5

[source]

A new Letter will be posted on a Sunday until the end of this series.

Enjoy!

Yours truly,

Mo x

Dear Katie,

I have finally gotten your letter!! My parents say they have my best interests at heart but they lie. Life is unbearable over here. If I finish writing this letter and was able to post it to you I would be impressed because I swear I am about to have heat stroke and die of dry skin. I never thought I would miss the gloomy weather in England but I do!! I have just come from washing my uniform. And by washing, I mean hand washing. I have to hang my uniform in my room to dry because the last time I hung my clothes outside they never made it back to my room :(

And another bad thing about this place- the food. The so-called "seniors" i.e. students in classes higher than me eat all the good stuff and leave the dregs for the rest of us. I swear, if I knew this was going to be my punishment for attending that stupid party I would never have gone. 

And Gloria has always been a slut! I cannot believe J is even wasting a breath on that witch! You need to get in there hun. Don't let her steal your man! How did the non-date go anyways??? I need details!!! You know I have no love life or friends to talk to here. I am living vicariously through you. It is sad but true.

Miss you loads babe!

F xx

P.S. I can't say for sure if this is covert status but the letter did not look tampered with which is good enough for me. Send my love to J. Hope he bounces back soon

Read It Or Not: Noughts & Crosses

[source]

Now, I know I mega late to this party for the folks of my generation but I am sure there are a few peeps like me who just did not get the memo. So, I am taking on the challenge of reading  Noughts & Crosses by Malorie Blackman with the mindset of my teenage self. Doubt that would be hard to be honest lol.

I have heard a lot of good reviews about this book so we will see what my overall opinion will be.

This is my book for September.

Feel free to join me on this adventure or share  your verdict on the books I plan to read or recommend the ones you love.

Yours truly,

Mo x

Read It Or Not: he's just not that into you

I cannot accuse everyone on this planet of being that person at least once (but I know that I would be right). You know, the person that makes up this fictitious world where the person they currently have a thing for is madly in love with them but just doesn't know how to display their affections articulately. The person that wills a phone to receive a message from their crush until their eyeballs dry out. The person that ignores their crush at a party or can only talk to their crush when they are a bit... "merry". The person that "mistakenly" dials their object of affection's number to randomly start a conversation. The person that convinces themselves time and time again that the reason why the guy/girl they are in love with has not replied, called, spoken to them, asked them out, acknowledged their existence etc is because their crush is currently undertaking a covert operation where they cannot contact a single soul...except the people he/she really cares about. The person that cries into the night because they have just realised that the dark horse that trotted into their life and stole their heart has given their's to another and will not be lending it to them anytime soon.

That person. 

I have been that person before. It is not fun being that person all day everyday. Sometimes it is. Especially when you have got a wild imagination. But mostly, it is quite painful. But have no fear for this book acts as a portable rehab centre for those lovers that cling onto the last shred of hope that the individual of their dreams will snap out of their slumber and realise what they had know all along. Trust me, after this reading this book most hopefuls will come to the conclusion that:

he's just not that into you.

Although it took me longer than usual to finish this book I thoroughly enjoyed it and hated it at the same time. Why? Because I somehow not only found the problems with the men being discussed in this book so glaringly obvious but I was also able to identify with almost each woman who penned the letters to Greg. Boy, the excuses I have come up with is just more proof that I am more creative than I thought. The book is a compilation of letters from women seeking advice about the men in their lives and they are placed in various Excuse categories. There are also fun workbooks for the readers to do at the end of each chapter. Some are quite silly but they make you giggle and get the point across at the same time.

I read this book on the bus to and from work; at the food court as I munched on my Mc Chicken sandwich; at home before I went to bed; and at the gym. Did I get weird looks from people? Yes. Did I care? Nope. 

I have no idea what I thought I would get out of it but I can tell you this:

 Once I finished the book (well, when I got to the part that says that I should not read anymore if I'm a 1st timer) it hit me.

I deleted a number from my phone and made no copy ;)

The authors are Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo and they were part of the Sex And The City's writing team. I love the way they made it clear who was talking in the book. It was like having a conversation with them. Although Greg was giving insight into the mind of the male species, having Liz's opinion on the matter made the whole book complete somehow. I think you will enjoy it. If you are not up for reading, you could always watch the movie based on it or watch Sex and the City :D

Read it or not, that is your choice.

Yours truly,

Mo x

What I Should Have Said

[source]

This is a very quick snapshot of a girl who is going through the age-old mantra of falling in love with what may seem to be the wrong guy,

Enjoy!

Yours truly,

Mo x

Grace was pottering around all morning after she got the phone call from the police station. A million things flitted through her mind. Should she call him? Should she go visit him? If she visited what should she bring? Would he even want to see her? To say she was confused on what to do is an understatement. Grace glanced outside her window and watched how the window panes were covered with sheets of water. Typical British weather. She decided that she would not go and visit him only to be turned away and be at the risk of catching a cold. 

Grace checked her clock and saw that it was 4.00 pm. 'The post man will be here soon', she thought. She rushed to her room and pulled out a pen and paper and began tow rite the following letter:

Dear RJ,

I highly doubt that I would ever have the courage to tell you this face-to-face so I thought that I would resort to using a more traditional mode of communication. I shall jump straight to the point as I know you wouldn't want me beating around the bush after what I did. I just thought I would try to explain why I mistakenly sent you to the A&E. I swear that that was not my intention at all. You just...pissed me off.

Look, I know that it is not your fault that when you walk into a place where I am in my heart literally skips a beat or beats that much quicker. I know it is not your fault that I turn into a mumbling idiot when you try to include me in conversations amongst our friends. I know it is not your fault that I spilt red wine all over your mothers white rug on your 18th as I was trying to show off my new dress (Soo sorry about that. Again). I know it is not your fault that every time you laugh I am immediately happy because you are. I know it is not your fault that I get immensely jealous when you get off with girls at clubs or get chatted up by them when we are out. I know that it is not your fault that you are not attracted to me in any way. I know that it is not your fault that you feel comfortable enough around me to ask me for advice on how to make up to your girlfriend of the year. I know that it is not your fault that you have no idea of how much I care about you and for how long because I have never let you told you. I know that it is not your fault that you had no idea that I am pregnant with the child of a man that cheated on me with my sister. I know that it is not your fault that I no longer the girl whom you used to swim with your back yard in just my swim shorts because my parents didn't see it fit to put a tank top on me or put me in a one-piece.

And most of all, I know that it is not your fault that I drenched your new squeeze in lemonade, punched you so hard that I broke your nose, knocked you unconscious and caused you to be cooped up in A&E because I could not find the words to tell you what was going on with me. 

I am very sorry about making your 25th a party to remember. I am sorry that my shitty life has caused you so much pain. It is just...you did not notice!  You didn't notice that I had cut my hair. You didn't notice that I had broken up with Deji. You didn't notice that I wasn't drinking or that you poking fun at my "sudden" weight gain was not funny. Not to me at least. I know I should have just told you these things instead or resorting to violence but you just rub me the wrong way. You always have. 

Anyway, do not worry. I will never contact you again after this. I just hope that this sort of sheds a little light on what was going on in my head.

Love, Grace xx

P.S. Thanks for dropping the charges by the way. I doubt I could have handled giving birth in jail. That would most definitely have sent me to the loony bin. 


When she was done, she placed it in an envelope, rushed downstairs to go and catch the postman who was just about to leave but was holding the door open for someone. As Grace was about to call out to the postman she stopped dead in tracks. For the person that the postman was letting into the building was the very last person she wanted to see.

'We need to talk', said Deji.

Letters: #4

[source]

A new Letter will be posted on a Sunday until the end of this series.

Enjoy!

Yours truly,

Mo x








Dearest Funmi,

I know this may seem like we are punishing but we are not. We are disciplining you. What you did or did not do is not the issue right now. It was the fact that you were involved in such a crowd. I did not bring you into this world for you to be associating yourself with such people. And your father most certainly did not. Do you want to end up in jail? Because that is where you were heading.

Cornerstone is a good school. Your father and I both went there and we both benefited a lot from it. Forcing you to find other ways of communicating is to teach you not to be come dependent on the internet. In my time we did not have Facebook or Twitter but we still survived. It can be done.

I hope you understand where we are coming from Funmi. I know we have not spoken properly since the event but I want you to know that I love you. I shall be coming to visit you in 3 months after which we'll go to grandma and grandpa's house for Christmas and New Year's.

Love,

Mum

Read It Or Not: 'he's just not that into you'

[source]

The next book that my eyes will be feasting on is 'he's just not that into you' by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo.

I cannot wait to read the book that one of my all time favourite movies was based on. I am not ashamed to say that I have had a crush on a guy who may not have been into me (or known I even existed for that matter) i.e. Idris Elba.

I guess I have to be patient and turn the pages of this book to realise all the "mistakes" I have been making.

This is is my book for August.

Feel free to join me on this adventure or share your verdict on the books I plan to read or recommend the ones you love.

Yours truly,

Mo x

B.L.E.U.R.G.H

[source]

Ever had a bunch of emotions wrack your body all at once that make you feel something you cannot explain, and simply describe your current state as - bleurgh?

Broken.

Lonely. 

Exhuasted. 

Ungrateful. 

Run Down. 

Gutted.

Hollow.

These are all words I would use to to make up the the word bleurgh. It is a moment in your life where things do not make sense. It is a time where your insides try to violently claw its way out of you through your mouth. It is a point where you wish time will just stop so that could have a chance to catch up with all that is happening around you.

Bleurgh.

Is that even a real word? I guess for each and every one of us it carries a different meaning. A meaning that can hardly be a meaning if it has so many different shades to it. Surely a word can only mean a set number of things, no?  There are approximately 7.1 billion people in the world. Can a word really have that many different number of meanings? 

Some say it is the sound you make when you throw up. So, I guess one can say that bleurgh  is that point in time when your body reacts badly, as a side reaction perhaps,  to a situation that either you found yourself in by chance or that you put yourself into.

To put it simply, bleurgh  is a state of mind that one may find themselves in, such that they are unable to coherently elucidate to another with words so resort to allowing their body to do the talking.

Yep, I am done rambling now.

I hope you are having a bleurgh-free day!

Yours truly,

Mo  x

Read It Or Not: 'The Fault In Our Stars' by John Green

John Green. Is. Amazing.

Fact.

After reading 'The Fault In Our Stars' the thought of being a writer seemed that much more appealing to me. I won't lie, I did feel inadequate to ever share my work/worlds with the world after reading his novel but I quickly banished such thoughts and resumed admiring his work. I am definitely going to buy his other books as I have a sneaky suspicion that I will like them all.

'The Fault In Our Stars' is a book about the life of a girl named Hazel Grace, who unfortunately has cancer, changed after an encounter with a boy named Augustus Waters at a Support Group meeting. One would think that this would be a heartbreakingly sad and morbid book and you are half-right. There are moments in the book where tears will well up in your eyes but that could due to the fragility of life or the beauty of the small moments that rack our ribs with laughter.

I remember feeling slightly inept when I read the book as some statements will go straight over my head. I would read it over and over again until I understood exactly what was deemed funny, beautiful, sad or down right tragic by the characters within this novel because I wanted to be a part of the story that was evolving with each turn of the page. It has now challenged me to step out of my comfort zone and read about a wider range of topics than the ones I am used to and to brush up my vocabulary. Crossword puzzles here I come!

'The Fault In Our Stars' is a great read. I thoroughly enjoyed it and would advise anyone and everyone to read it at least once. The book is woven with quirky banter, heart, emotions and intelligence. 

Read it or not. That's your choice.

Yours truly,

Mo x

Update
P.S Apparently they are making the film adaptation of the book and is rumored to be released in 2014/2015 :O Can't wait to see what they come up with!!!

Letters: # 3

[source]

A new Letter will be posted on a Sunday until the end of this series.

Enjoy!

Yours truly,

Mo x







Dearest Funmi,

I have no idea if this letter will even reach your pretty little hands but I thought I'll give it a go. I can't believe that your parents sent you all the way to NIGERIA because of that liiiiiitle hiccup last week (Hi Mr & Mrs A if you are reading this- soo not impressed with your decision btw). It wasn't even your fault! This place is not the same without you, F. Gloria is already making her move. The slut! She didn't even wait for the dust to settle before she tried to get her dirty little paws on the new guy at school. Poor Jack is still reeling from catching her pantie-handed. Not her finest moment. Although, when has there ever been? lol.

Hope it's not unbearably hot there and that you actually get to enjoy the sun. Tola said it's summer all year round there. It's tippin it down here as usual. I wish I could come visit or that we could at least talk on Skype. Have to say, this is a bit of an ancient way to communicate. 

Come back to me!!!

Luv you,

Kate xxx


P.S. Let me know if this is covert status

Sources of Inspiration

[source]

It is funny how the weirdest things give rise to bursts of ideas of things to write about.

As I already have another blog I have been wondering what the true essence of this blog will be. What would I write about? Would I be able to realistically churn out stories every week/month? Would my imagination be able to keep up with that kind of commitment. 

And then I had a good ol'cup of lemon green tea by Twinings and then  thoughts popped into my head. It's a good thing I have a notebook handy. This space on the interweb goes beyond the daily nothings and somethings that usually pop up in my head. It feels like a space where I can showcase the creativity of the written word and the things that inspire them; be it my own or others.

Again, I don't want to limit the potential of this blog but I have a feeling that this will be the main focus of the blog. I just want to convince myself that I don't have mutiple blog disorder (MBO).

Yours truly,

Mo x

Letters: #2

[source]

A new Letter will be posted on a Sunday until the end of this series.

Enjoy!

Yours truly,

Mo x







Dear Mr Ogoni,

Admission of Miss Funmi Adebayo into Cornerstone Academy

My wife and I would like to thank you again for seamlessly admitting our daughter into your school on such short notice. I trust that you would keep an eye on her and make sure that she is fitting in with her peers. Please, as we told you before, treat her like every other student. We have heard great things about your school in terms of discipline and the quality of education so I am sure my daughter is in good hands.I expect a full report on my daughter's progress at your school every month.

And as for they donation towards the improvement of the arts department, I have spoken to the administrator of the school and made some arrangements with her.

Thank you once again for your cooperation.

Yours sincerely,

Mr Adebayo

Read It Or Not: Ground Zero

[source]

Read It Or Not  is another new series I shall start on this blog. This, however, will not be a showcase of my poor attempts at putting my imaginary worlds into words but rather a way for me to express my thoughts on the books I am reading every month.

I will start of with one book a month and see if I pick up pace as the  weeks roll by.

The book for July is The Fault In Our Stars by John Green.

Feel free to join me on this adventure or share your verdict on the books I plan to read or recommend the ones you love.

Yours truly,

Mo x

Letters: #1

[source]

A new Letter will be posted on a Sunday until the end of this series.

Enjoy!

Yours truly,

Mo x

Dear mum and dad,

I know you think you are doing the best for me but you are wrong. This is the worst decision you have made in the history of the planet! How could you send me to this place??? I have to resort to archaic modes of communication. Isn't civilization past this? You have completely ruined everything! They have kept me in what seems like an old prison cell and then expect me to then sleep on this ridiculously hard spring bed. Were these put in the brochure?? Did you actual view this place?? Request for your money back! And while you are at it, turn around and pick me up. Please!! I promise I will do better. I will stay out of your way and will never bring the family any shame…again.

Don’t I have a say in any of this? It is my life you are playing with here. The students here are…wild. There was a girl who gave me a look that could have split me in half if looks had powers. Please, let this be a joke. I have learnt my lesson. I want to go home and hang out with my friends. I cannot survive in this place. It is too hot! And the accent is so bad I can hardly understand a word. Please, I cannot spend the next year in this godforsaken country! Nigeria is not my home. Manchester is!

Your daughter in need,

Funmi

Letters: Ground Zero

[source]

Letters will be the first series that I shall start on this blog.

As the title suggests, it will be a collection of letters written by various characters that I dream up making their voice heard via the written word.

All Letters will be posted on a Sunday; a day the postman does not come to visit.

Thanks in advance for taking a peek!

Yours truly,

Mo x 

Excerpt: 'Untitled' Novel

[source]

Today's entry will be about a girl called Ava. This is a fictional story written by me. If this tale in any way resembles your life, it is purely coincidental.

Yours truly,

Mo x

'Untitled'

‘I didn't do too badly if you ask me’.

Dominic took a quick look at me and said, ‘Did you at least remember to use deodorant this time?’

I sigh and quickly reach behind my seat to find my secret stash of toiletries. As you may have already come to this conclusion, this is not the first time I have been late for school. I almost kill us both with the fumes from the evil lavender smelling canister. Dominic throws me an evil glare as he winds down the window. I smile apologetically and put the deodorant away. We finally get to school and both dash out of the car, running to get to our first class of the day.

‘You are making a habit out of this Miss Johnson’.

I smile apologetically at my Media Studies teacher, Mr Zone and take my usual seat at the back of the class right behind Nickev. I shake my head to stop myself heading down that treacherous route. Day dreaming about Nickev is not the way to go for any girl who wants to remain in control of herself because as soon as you make that fatal mistake, he will forever have a hold on you and all you can do is pretend that he doesn't to his face.

Lying to yourself is just not cool.

Lying to everyone else, however, is sort of okay when your reputation is at stake.

It is not hard to concentrate in Mr Z’s class because he is by far my favourite teacher and one of the main reasons I want to study Journalism at uni. He was the one who came up with the brilliant idea that is the school newspaper created for and by the students. Now we have our own website thanks to the amazing collaboration between the IT, Media Studies, Eng. Lit. and Art students as a huge project that was worth 30% of our grades. It was so much fun to do and I got to make friends with people I wouldn't normally look twice at.

After we watched a one and a half hour documentary on the “Doom and Gloom of the Demand and Supply of Oil and Power Today”, Mr Z asked us what our views were on both the topic and the way the documentary was delivered.  A debate between a group of students broke out.

‘Now I am sure Ava has something to say on that subject’, said Mr Zone, pulling me out of my thoughts.

The whole class sighs in unison as they turn to look at me. Ok, it is not my fault I am strongly opinionated and make my voice heard. I look up at Mr Z who is waiting for me to say something but my mind is completely blank. I honestly don’t know that much about big oil companies and their plans to make us destitute before we even think of buying cars and filling them up with petrol or diesel. So I simply say-

‘I have nothing to say on that subject sir’.

‘Is that because you agree with what the reporter was saying or do you have no clue what is going on in any sector apart from…oh wait, no you don’t know much about fashion either’, said Nickev coolly. Most people sniggered at that remark. He was one of the few people who did not bother to turn round to look at me.

I close my eyes and count to ten before I say, ‘I am not sorry that I don’t dress the same way as those insipid barbie dolls you hang out with and date do. And I do know a thing or two about fashion. I just do not like the way it's heading. As for the clip about the upheaval in the oil sector, you are right I do not know much about it but I don’t go around making people feel bad to make myself feel better’.

I stand up from my seat, gather my things and make my way out of the class but Mr Z tries to stop me before I reach the door. Luckily for me he sees the tears in my eyes and lets me go. As I make my way to the student common room I secretly pray that Nickev runs out of the class after me to apologise and sweep me up in his arms and-

‘What’s wrong Ava?’ I’m asked by my good friend Kemi who is skiving her math class as she always does on a Thursday morning; not because she hates math but because she is way ahead of the class already. She makes room for me on this huge table she’s sat at which is completely covered with graphs on what looked like vectors, math textbooks and notes. I sit down next to her and rest my head on her shoulder. She wraps her arms around me which instantly makes me feel loved.

Kemi is by far the best girlfriend ever! She knows exactly what to say at the right time, is her own person, she is smart and too kind sometimes. She sticks up for you even when you are clearly in the wrong and usually wins the argument. I have known her for the past 3 years now since her parents dropped her off at her aunt’s and went back to Nigeria. And I can proudly say that I have loved her for that long.

I wipe away the tears that escaped from my eyes and raise up my head. I look her dead in the eye and she starts to smile. Her grin gets progressively bigger when I start to smile too. I shake my head and she says,‘What altercation have you and Nickev gotten into now?’

I sigh and cover my face.

Kemi gasped. ‘You are going red!’ She giggles and then when she sees my face she stops immediately and I can see her trying to think of anything that will make her stop laughing. People start clambering into the common room which means its time for our Psychology class.

‘He dissed my style’.

‘Erm…what style, child?’ she says in a Southern American accent. ‘You need help in that department honey. I mean I know you like your comfort but there are other ways of being comfortable’.

I laugh.

‘So you are taking his side now?’ I say as I wait for her to pack up her stuff.

‘No, hun. I’m on your side one hundred percent’, she says looking at me, a little hurt by my accusation. ‘I am just saying, it wouldn't hurt for you to at least put some effort into your “look” or at least shower before you come to school’.

I instinctively sniff myself and decide I don’t reek enough to be lethal. On our way to our next class we bump into no other than Nickev. He takes one look at us and before he has a chance to say anything I head into my Psychology class that was conveniently two steps away. Kemi tuts at him as she enters the classroom and sits down next to me. I sneak a look at the door to find Nickev staring straight at me. As soon as our eyes lock he chuckles and walks away. I feel my face burning as I have once again let him know that I care what he thinks of me.